It's amazing to me how Square continues to make high quality games with modern sensibilities that get snubbed simply for being such, yet when they commission low-effort, barely playable and never enjoyable faux-retro games that bring nothing new or interesting to the table year after year, they consistently get rewarded with praise and high sales. Octopath Traveler is yet another example of that, mashing low-resolution 2D sprites into a 3D environment with pixelated textures and overblown blurring shaders to create an overly busy mishmash of elements that is neither appealing for fans of retro RPGs nor pleasing to look at in the slightest. You can't even admire the (admittedly decent) spritework because the colors are consistently washed out or undersaturated by the harsh lighting, and every combat sprite and action is accompanied by dozens of incredibly distracting 3D models and lighting effects. Even navigating around towns is a pain since everything more than a few inches away from center screen becomes a darkened blurry soup; this might just be the world's first video game simulation of glaucoma. Gameplay is no better than the hideous graphics; badly acted, poorly written dialog scenes drone on for ages, every fight is a damage sponge filled slog that takes far too long to finish (boss fights last thirty minutes at minimum) and constant random encounters only further add to the agony. Fill the rest with a juvenile tone, shallow characterizations, clichéd storylines and grind-heavy character building that drags beyond belief, and you have a truly wretched experience.
I already know the apologist fanboys will try to derail criticism of Octopath's hacky writing and design shortcomings by calling it an 'homage' to the RPGs of the 16-bit era and asserting that it's 'unfair' to judge it by modern standards. I say that's bunk. An homage shows respect to its source material and strives to showcase the things that make it exceptional; Octopath just uses the label as an excuse to trot out tired, dated clichés and design tropes of the past, and only serves as a reminder of why they should have stayed there. The writers and designers never spared a thought for innovating or improving on what came before, just copying, and the end result is just what you'd expect - a tired, tedious experience with a layer of smug complacency that makes it all the more insulting. So instead of wasting your time on a cynical imitation, just play a few of the actual standout JRPGs of the 16-bit era instead, like Chrono Trigger, Dragon Quest III and V, Final Fantasy V and VI, Super Mario RPG, Phantasy Star IV, Breath of Fire, Terranigma, Illusion of Gaia or Earthbound. Or if you want some modern games that celebrate everything great about their predecessors while doing much to set themselves apart too, play Undertale, Dragon Quest XI S, Ni no Kuni II, Divinity: Original Sin II, XCOM 2, Indivisible, Bloodstained, Valkyria Chronicles 4 or Prey. Either way though, leave Octopath to be forgotten alongside the other yearly dozens of imitation retro games made by content mills like Acquire who say they love retro games, but only really love the easy sales they get by saying that.
Developer: Square Enix/Acquire
Publisher: Square Enix
Released: 2018
Platforms: Switch, PC, Stadia